Written to-do lists, on a notepad, where I can cross things off as I do them, are MUCH more effective than blogging my to-do list.
That is one habit I've developed while here that I'm DEFINITELY keeping up when I get back home. It's deceptively simple and extremely effective.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
At the playground
When I first got to the playground this morning, there were three women and eight men. The ratio usually ends up being closer to 1:1, but there are lots of male nannies and young dads who care for their kids here.
Guy walked over to the basketball court (it appeared to be a pretty standard size) and found a basketball with no bounce. He picked up the ball, walked over to the basket, and hurled it as high as he could. I wish I'd had a camera to capture the image of my small son attempting such a feat in the large and empty court. And where'd he pick up on what to do, anyway?
My favorite playground incident of the summer happened this morning. Two four-year-olds, a boy and a girl, were eating snacks together while their dads talked a few feet away.
Girl: What kind of underwear do you have on? I'm wearing flower sparkly! What kind do you have?
Boy: I have Spiderman underwear.
Girl: Cool. I wanna see. I wanna see your Spiderman underwear!
Boy lifts his shirt, drops his drawers, and says, "See, Spiderman!"
AND I ONLY HAVE 28 MORE HOURS IN PHILADELPHIA. Sorry, Becca, not trying to rub it in. But you are going to Argentina soon!
Kids really do the funniest things.
Guy walked over to the basketball court (it appeared to be a pretty standard size) and found a basketball with no bounce. He picked up the ball, walked over to the basket, and hurled it as high as he could. I wish I'd had a camera to capture the image of my small son attempting such a feat in the large and empty court. And where'd he pick up on what to do, anyway?
My favorite playground incident of the summer happened this morning. Two four-year-olds, a boy and a girl, were eating snacks together while their dads talked a few feet away.
Girl: What kind of underwear do you have on? I'm wearing flower sparkly! What kind do you have?
Boy: I have Spiderman underwear.
Girl: Cool. I wanna see. I wanna see your Spiderman underwear!
Boy lifts his shirt, drops his drawers, and says, "See, Spiderman!"
AND I ONLY HAVE 28 MORE HOURS IN PHILADELPHIA. Sorry, Becca, not trying to rub it in. But you are going to Argentina soon!
Kids really do the funniest things.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Sunday, Sunday
It's been a really relaxing weekend.
We did hardly anything. We watched Lars and the Real Girl (Shauna--you need to see this film if you haven't already). We watched some episodes of Monk. We ate breakfast at this awesome little bakery. We walked down to the botany pond and saw a family of ducks, some enormous fish, and four turtles. Guy liked the fish the best, I think.
We ate at an awesome Indian buffet. We went to church where Guy did great in nursery and I did terribly in Relief Society. Not my favorite RS lesson ever.
We all napped during a thunderstorm this afternoon. We threw socks at each other, and sang songs.
It's been a lovely weekend.
And next week? I get to pack! And clean! And go to Scranton where I can see Amy and go swimming! Hooray!!!
We did hardly anything. We watched Lars and the Real Girl (Shauna--you need to see this film if you haven't already). We watched some episodes of Monk. We ate breakfast at this awesome little bakery. We walked down to the botany pond and saw a family of ducks, some enormous fish, and four turtles. Guy liked the fish the best, I think.
We ate at an awesome Indian buffet. We went to church where Guy did great in nursery and I did terribly in Relief Society. Not my favorite RS lesson ever.
We all napped during a thunderstorm this afternoon. We threw socks at each other, and sang songs.
It's been a lovely weekend.
And next week? I get to pack! And clean! And go to Scranton where I can see Amy and go swimming! Hooray!!!
Friday, July 25, 2008
Sleep
Wednesday night, I was pooped. Several days of staying up until 10:30 and getting up with Guy somewhere around 6 was getting to be too much. Oh, and one night of him going to bed late, waking up super sweaty, and then sleeping in bed with us from 1 until 6 when he woke up (meaning little sleep for me).
So I went to bed around 9:30. Guy woke up three times in the middle of the night, but went back to sleep all three times (twice we nursed). Then the good child slept until nearly 8. Last night Josh and I went to bed at 11:30 and the kid woke up at 5:47. Ugh.
I'm going back to bed while he naps.
So I went to bed around 9:30. Guy woke up three times in the middle of the night, but went back to sleep all three times (twice we nursed). Then the good child slept until nearly 8. Last night Josh and I went to bed at 11:30 and the kid woke up at 5:47. Ugh.
I'm going back to bed while he naps.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
And Now For Something Completely Different
Things that make me smile (translation: a non-complaining post):
Guy asking me to sing Popcorn Popping 70 times a day. I kid you not--I've gone as long as 12 minutes straight before ignoring his request and singing something else. The gestures he makes? To die for. I love this kid.
Chocolate pudding cups. Need I say more?
French bread pizza for dinner tonight! It's a bit more work than usual, but SO tasty. And it's cool enough in the apartment tonight to handle it.
Watching Guy mesmerized by the thunderstorms last night. We let him stay up nearly an extra half hour because he was so intrigued, standing against the back of the couch looking out the window.
Fantastic burritos! We have a Qdoba restaurant down the street, and last night I had an awesome steak burrito with guacamole, cilantro lime rice, black beans, and pico de gallo. Seriously tasty.
Lovely neighbors who keep an eye on things for us. Michelle--you guys rock and you know it.
Hmm, seems like my primary pleasures this week are food and Guy. Works for me, I suppose.
Guy asking me to sing Popcorn Popping 70 times a day. I kid you not--I've gone as long as 12 minutes straight before ignoring his request and singing something else. The gestures he makes? To die for. I love this kid.
Chocolate pudding cups. Need I say more?
French bread pizza for dinner tonight! It's a bit more work than usual, but SO tasty. And it's cool enough in the apartment tonight to handle it.
Watching Guy mesmerized by the thunderstorms last night. We let him stay up nearly an extra half hour because he was so intrigued, standing against the back of the couch looking out the window.
Fantastic burritos! We have a Qdoba restaurant down the street, and last night I had an awesome steak burrito with guacamole, cilantro lime rice, black beans, and pico de gallo. Seriously tasty.
Lovely neighbors who keep an eye on things for us. Michelle--you guys rock and you know it.
Hmm, seems like my primary pleasures this week are food and Guy. Works for me, I suppose.
Sticky
Sunday I told Josh that I never knew that the weather could be "sweaty". It's not hot here, it's not partly cloudy, it's sweaty.
Tuesday I walked the six blocks and back to Barnes & Noble for the second Fablehaven book for Josh. I also read the first Fablehaven book myself while Guy played--I rather enjoyed it, I must admit. Two blocks into my journey, all of my underwear was sticking to me and I had pit stains. On my over-sized Ron Jon t-shirt. Right now it's about 94 degrees at 40% humidity. Yuck is about all I can say. I can't keep this apartment cool to save my life.
Then on my way back I must have bruised something important in my foot, because walking after that was ridiculously painful. This resulted in me not accompanying Josh on "diversity day" yesterday (don't ask me what that means). Where he got to go tour the Constitution Center and Independence Hall. Something I really wanted to do while we're out here. I was majorly bummed. I'm fairly certain he's not interested in going back with me, so it's either go by myself or don't go.
So I watched 27 Dresses instead. Which I admit, I thoroughly enjoyed. I might even watch it again today, I liked it so much. It made me feel a bit better. And I had an appointment with a midwife. I drove about 30 blocks west and saw a total of 3 white people. One of whom was the midwife.
The appointment went well, everything looks great, and I am reassured that I'm doing just fine with this baby. I have not yet gained excessive amounts of weight, so we'll see if we can prevent that this time around. I really don't need any more stretchmarks. Oh! And she only charged me $30 for an hour of talking, reassuring, etc. Awesome.
There were many very cool thunderstorms last night. From about 4:00 onward I saw at least seven separate thunderstorms, a few of which passed by really closely with so much rain that the street next to our apartment flooded.
I'm trying really hard to be positive, but I feel more tired of it every day. Like I'm in some bizarre holding pattern. I should find more joy in what I'm doing now, instead of waiting for the next better thing.
Honestly? That's really hard to do. Yesterday I cried. A lot.
On the list for today is grocery shopping. Hopefully I can make it there and back without getting rained on--but the sky looks dubious. Which means I won't chance the park, either. So it's day four of being inside most of the day for Guy and me. Let's hope he doesn't go stir-crazy.
Tuesday I walked the six blocks and back to Barnes & Noble for the second Fablehaven book for Josh. I also read the first Fablehaven book myself while Guy played--I rather enjoyed it, I must admit. Two blocks into my journey, all of my underwear was sticking to me and I had pit stains. On my over-sized Ron Jon t-shirt. Right now it's about 94 degrees at 40% humidity. Yuck is about all I can say. I can't keep this apartment cool to save my life.
Then on my way back I must have bruised something important in my foot, because walking after that was ridiculously painful. This resulted in me not accompanying Josh on "diversity day" yesterday (don't ask me what that means). Where he got to go tour the Constitution Center and Independence Hall. Something I really wanted to do while we're out here. I was majorly bummed. I'm fairly certain he's not interested in going back with me, so it's either go by myself or don't go.
So I watched 27 Dresses instead. Which I admit, I thoroughly enjoyed. I might even watch it again today, I liked it so much. It made me feel a bit better. And I had an appointment with a midwife. I drove about 30 blocks west and saw a total of 3 white people. One of whom was the midwife.
The appointment went well, everything looks great, and I am reassured that I'm doing just fine with this baby. I have not yet gained excessive amounts of weight, so we'll see if we can prevent that this time around. I really don't need any more stretchmarks. Oh! And she only charged me $30 for an hour of talking, reassuring, etc. Awesome.
There were many very cool thunderstorms last night. From about 4:00 onward I saw at least seven separate thunderstorms, a few of which passed by really closely with so much rain that the street next to our apartment flooded.
I'm trying really hard to be positive, but I feel more tired of it every day. Like I'm in some bizarre holding pattern. I should find more joy in what I'm doing now, instead of waiting for the next better thing.
Honestly? That's really hard to do. Yesterday I cried. A lot.
On the list for today is grocery shopping. Hopefully I can make it there and back without getting rained on--but the sky looks dubious. Which means I won't chance the park, either. So it's day four of being inside most of the day for Guy and me. Let's hope he doesn't go stir-crazy.
Monday, July 21, 2008
10 days
10 days left. *deep breath*
Only 10 more days living in the city. Hey, and two of those are a weekend, so Josh will be around! I can do anything for 10 days, right?
And then we'll know if Josh will be sticking around for two weeks after that or if we'll head up to Michigan early.
While in the car last night driving back from Scranton (what a blessed place that is--respite is the perfect word to describe it) I realized that we'd only add 90 miles to our return trip to check out two or Josh's top PhD choices. We're planning on taking the trip slowly anyway, so that will be great to have first-hand experience of those schools. If we check out the two universities in Michigan that will make four schools. Add UPenn (no, we're not going to UPenn for graduate school) and we'll have five schools' experience under our belt. Pretty useful, I'd say.
In other news, I miss Wymount. A whole heck of a lot. Because it's no fun going to the playground when you don't know anybody, you're afraid your kid's going to walk head first into the swings, and it's a 25-minute walk in 95 degree heat (with 50% humidity!). *whine*
At least I had a nice weekend.
Only 10 more days living in the city. Hey, and two of those are a weekend, so Josh will be around! I can do anything for 10 days, right?
And then we'll know if Josh will be sticking around for two weeks after that or if we'll head up to Michigan early.
While in the car last night driving back from Scranton (what a blessed place that is--respite is the perfect word to describe it) I realized that we'd only add 90 miles to our return trip to check out two or Josh's top PhD choices. We're planning on taking the trip slowly anyway, so that will be great to have first-hand experience of those schools. If we check out the two universities in Michigan that will make four schools. Add UPenn (no, we're not going to UPenn for graduate school) and we'll have five schools' experience under our belt. Pretty useful, I'd say.
In other news, I miss Wymount. A whole heck of a lot. Because it's no fun going to the playground when you don't know anybody, you're afraid your kid's going to walk head first into the swings, and it's a 25-minute walk in 95 degree heat (with 50% humidity!). *whine*
At least I had a nice weekend.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Simply Smiling
I've been thinking about a lot lately. It happens when I have a lot of time on my hands but the boy won't let me read, etc. I've realized just how simple my life is this week. My primary responsibilities are simply to care for my family. Feed them well and keep the apartment tidy. Take it easy so there's nothing to worry about with the baby.
I like the idea of having less to do. It's a wonderful time for me to sit quietly and ponder. 'Tis a gift to be simple.
Living more simply in this apartment has also given me a great opportunity to re-think what I really need to care for my family. Example: five frying pans? Nope, I can make do with two--one big and one small. Fewer dishes will pile up that way.
I watched a great film last night. "A Good Year" with Russell Crowe. I was afraid I wouldn't like it, but it was incredible. Thoughtful, but not preachy. Funny, without trying too hard. And the best part?
It made me feel like I was in the French countryside for two hours. I completely forgot I was in West Philly.
I like the idea of having less to do. It's a wonderful time for me to sit quietly and ponder. 'Tis a gift to be simple.
Living more simply in this apartment has also given me a great opportunity to re-think what I really need to care for my family. Example: five frying pans? Nope, I can make do with two--one big and one small. Fewer dishes will pile up that way.
I watched a great film last night. "A Good Year" with Russell Crowe. I was afraid I wouldn't like it, but it was incredible. Thoughtful, but not preachy. Funny, without trying too hard. And the best part?
It made me feel like I was in the French countryside for two hours. I completely forgot I was in West Philly.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Hooray! Someone who cares!
I found a midwife who will see me here in Philly!
This brings great relief, as I've had every other office tell me that they won't see me (including all those within walking distance).
In my mind this is completely ridiculous. I need 10 minutes worth of care just to make sure there's nothing worrisome going on that would be easy to spot. The policies some of these places have drive me crazy.
Luckily the midwife isn't that far away, either. Too far to walk comfortably, but only a 15 minute drive or so. And I only have to make two turns. I could manage that, even without Josh.
I'm feeling pretty tired today. Maybe I didn't get enough sleep this weekend? I'm not sure. It was pouring rain most of the morning, so Guy and I just made a quick grocery run and came back home instead of hitting the park as planned. I picked up a redbox DVD of WordWorld to keep him occupied this afternoon while stuck inside.
I'm feeling pretty chipper this morning. I'm going to make french bread pizza under the broiler for dinner, and have a to-do list that will leave me feeling satisfied and not overwhelmed. Only two weeks and two days left in this apartment, until we make another transition.
(pssst . . . we might ditch out of the internship two weeks early--maybe that's why I'm feeling happy today!)
This brings great relief, as I've had every other office tell me that they won't see me (including all those within walking distance).
In my mind this is completely ridiculous. I need 10 minutes worth of care just to make sure there's nothing worrisome going on that would be easy to spot. The policies some of these places have drive me crazy.
Luckily the midwife isn't that far away, either. Too far to walk comfortably, but only a 15 minute drive or so. And I only have to make two turns. I could manage that, even without Josh.
I'm feeling pretty tired today. Maybe I didn't get enough sleep this weekend? I'm not sure. It was pouring rain most of the morning, so Guy and I just made a quick grocery run and came back home instead of hitting the park as planned. I picked up a redbox DVD of WordWorld to keep him occupied this afternoon while stuck inside.
I'm feeling pretty chipper this morning. I'm going to make french bread pizza under the broiler for dinner, and have a to-do list that will leave me feeling satisfied and not overwhelmed. Only two weeks and two days left in this apartment, until we make another transition.
(pssst . . . we might ditch out of the internship two weeks early--maybe that's why I'm feeling happy today!)
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Tired
I was up until 1 a.m. last night watching TV and surfing the internet. Guy woke up at 5:30 and didn't go back to bed.
It's been a good day, despite feeling a bit fatigued. I got all the laundry washed--but need to fold two of the three loads still. We all took showers (Guy got a bath). We went to Aunt Mary Kay's and Uncle Lou's 25th Anniversary party. We played Mario Party 8 on the Wii. I really did enjoy the day.
Josh and I decided this weekend that we're really not cut out for living in the middle of downtown in a huge city.
Josh is feeling stressed but can't figure out why and it's affecting his health. This is simultaneously a difficulty and a blessing. It makes me snap out of my "poor me" mentality and in serving him and Guy helps me feel happier. But it's hard to be the one that's primarily responsible for everything on the weekends because Josh needs to relax in order to survive the next week. Especially as the fear sometimes gets the best of me when I'm thinking about the pregnancy.
I don't want to go back to Philly, but I'm reconciling myself to the fact that it really is better than staying here. As Becca commented on my last post--I'm extremely grateful to have an out that's sooner rather than later.
And we might get to see Jeremy and Amy! That would rock it to the awesome. I have no idea where I picked up that phrase, but I like it. Anyway, they're thinking of coming out to visit.
Thus ends my long, boring, and pictureless post. I still haven't found the batteries, so maybe I should just buy some, eh? Maybe.
It's been a good day, despite feeling a bit fatigued. I got all the laundry washed--but need to fold two of the three loads still. We all took showers (Guy got a bath). We went to Aunt Mary Kay's and Uncle Lou's 25th Anniversary party. We played Mario Party 8 on the Wii. I really did enjoy the day.
Josh and I decided this weekend that we're really not cut out for living in the middle of downtown in a huge city.
Josh is feeling stressed but can't figure out why and it's affecting his health. This is simultaneously a difficulty and a blessing. It makes me snap out of my "poor me" mentality and in serving him and Guy helps me feel happier. But it's hard to be the one that's primarily responsible for everything on the weekends because Josh needs to relax in order to survive the next week. Especially as the fear sometimes gets the best of me when I'm thinking about the pregnancy.
I don't want to go back to Philly, but I'm reconciling myself to the fact that it really is better than staying here. As Becca commented on my last post--I'm extremely grateful to have an out that's sooner rather than later.
And we might get to see Jeremy and Amy! That would rock it to the awesome. I have no idea where I picked up that phrase, but I like it. Anyway, they're thinking of coming out to visit.
Thus ends my long, boring, and pictureless post. I still haven't found the batteries, so maybe I should just buy some, eh? Maybe.
Friday, July 11, 2008
I know, I know
You're all dying for an update, right?
Well, the weather the last two days has been bearable. I got to see Becca today. We're going to Scranton this afternoon (swimming pool! hell's kitchen! food network!backyard!). We've successfully survived three weeks in Pennsylvania, and have five to go.
In other news, I'm feeling vulnerable and lonely. I have a really hard time not crying when I think about missing my friends. I want to be able to step outside my door and not have to put my armor on because I don't know who will approach me or what they'll want.
At the grocery store this morning, a lady with a speech impediment told me she wanted to buy my groceries for me with her food stamps in exchange for cash. I lied and told her I didn't have any cash. I'm assuming her proposal was illegal, and it made me wonder what she wanted the cash for. I sighed, realized I didn't want to know, and wandered around trying to find napkins (it's a really counterintuitive grocery setup).
Keeping busy with Guy underfoot is hard. I run out of ideas by noon most days, and out of energy even before that.
The thought that keeps running through my head?
This is the hardest thing I've ever done.
Oh, yeah. And I can't find an OB/GYN who will see me for just one apointment here in Philadelphia, so I'll probably have to spend a week in Scranton without Josh and go see my aunt's doctor. Who has graciously agreed to see me if I need anything. Everywhere I turn there are road blocks and blessings. But it's still hard.
Well, the weather the last two days has been bearable. I got to see Becca today. We're going to Scranton this afternoon (swimming pool! hell's kitchen! food network!backyard!). We've successfully survived three weeks in Pennsylvania, and have five to go.
In other news, I'm feeling vulnerable and lonely. I have a really hard time not crying when I think about missing my friends. I want to be able to step outside my door and not have to put my armor on because I don't know who will approach me or what they'll want.
At the grocery store this morning, a lady with a speech impediment told me she wanted to buy my groceries for me with her food stamps in exchange for cash. I lied and told her I didn't have any cash. I'm assuming her proposal was illegal, and it made me wonder what she wanted the cash for. I sighed, realized I didn't want to know, and wandered around trying to find napkins (it's a really counterintuitive grocery setup).
Keeping busy with Guy underfoot is hard. I run out of ideas by noon most days, and out of energy even before that.
The thought that keeps running through my head?
This is the hardest thing I've ever done.
Oh, yeah. And I can't find an OB/GYN who will see me for just one apointment here in Philadelphia, so I'll probably have to spend a week in Scranton without Josh and go see my aunt's doctor. Who has graciously agreed to see me if I need anything. Everywhere I turn there are road blocks and blessings. But it's still hard.
Friday, July 4, 2008
Ambivalence
Happy 4th, everybody.
We had a nice relaxing day in Scranton, with barbecue, a pool, not too many people, good laughs, and some fireworks. A nice day.
And I don't want to go back to Philadelphia. I know I've only been there for four days. But I don't want to go back.
I know that I should. Josh needs the support, and I need to not be a burden to his relatives for a month.
But I'm having a hard time being positive about our situation. Especially when I compare it to what it was intended to be--our nice suburban Victorian home with a washer/dryer, partially furnished, with internet and cable, near a duck pond, park, pool, and Trader Joe's.
Instead I have anxiety, strange people, a flight of stairs and three locked doors through which to maneuver, pregnancy restrictions, and an apartment that's like an inferno much of the day. I'm pretty sure it's the reason Guy's naps are suddenly 45 minutes long. He wakes up in a sweat.
Today, in a room with an a/c, he napped for more than 2 hours.
I'm struggling. I know it's only 22 more days that we'll actually be in Philly. I also know that if the situation were different in any one of a number of different ways it would be much easier.
But it's not easier. It's hard. It's hot. It's tiring. I feel that I shouldn't complain to Josh--I don't want him to be upset for me. I know I can do this. I can even do my best to be cheerful about it.
This leaves me thinking: what about the times that I don't want to?
We had a nice relaxing day in Scranton, with barbecue, a pool, not too many people, good laughs, and some fireworks. A nice day.
And I don't want to go back to Philadelphia. I know I've only been there for four days. But I don't want to go back.
I know that I should. Josh needs the support, and I need to not be a burden to his relatives for a month.
But I'm having a hard time being positive about our situation. Especially when I compare it to what it was intended to be--our nice suburban Victorian home with a washer/dryer, partially furnished, with internet and cable, near a duck pond, park, pool, and Trader Joe's.
Instead I have anxiety, strange people, a flight of stairs and three locked doors through which to maneuver, pregnancy restrictions, and an apartment that's like an inferno much of the day. I'm pretty sure it's the reason Guy's naps are suddenly 45 minutes long. He wakes up in a sweat.
Today, in a room with an a/c, he napped for more than 2 hours.
I'm struggling. I know it's only 22 more days that we'll actually be in Philly. I also know that if the situation were different in any one of a number of different ways it would be much easier.
But it's not easier. It's hard. It's hot. It's tiring. I feel that I shouldn't complain to Josh--I don't want him to be upset for me. I know I can do this. I can even do my best to be cheerful about it.
This leaves me thinking: what about the times that I don't want to?
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
It's an Education, all right!
Things I have learned from my three days in Philadelphia:
Lightning bugs are really cool!
Smokers? Very not cool.
I will never take a nearby and safe playground for granted again.
I hate having to lock three doors behind me when I leave the house.
It's very hard to convince Guy to go down our apartment's stairs without being carried.
I love being two blocks from a grocery store.
I hate carrying a purse, stroller, groceries, and dragging Guy behind me up a flight of stairs.
I like the city. But I miss my friends.
I love, love, love familiar places.
Lightning bugs are really cool!
Smokers? Very not cool.
I will never take a nearby and safe playground for granted again.
I hate having to lock three doors behind me when I leave the house.
It's very hard to convince Guy to go down our apartment's stairs without being carried.
I love being two blocks from a grocery store.
I hate carrying a purse, stroller, groceries, and dragging Guy behind me up a flight of stairs.
I like the city. But I miss my friends.
I love, love, love familiar places.
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